So what about Canada? All the buzz and excitment of Obama's inauguration has completely eclipsed the Canuck political scene. Grade 11 students at Sudbury's What-This-Country-Needs-Is-A-Good-Nickel-Cigar High School were asked recently to name the Canadian Prime Minister. 32% said Ron McLean, 24% said they didn't know, 10% asked to be excused to attend to their beaver pelts, and rest offered up a variety of incorrect answers, including Robert Mugabe, David Beckham, Alan Greenspan, Valerie Pringle, and Sir Edmund Hillary. A surprising number (4) thought it was Delbert Feeney, a scallop-monger from Antigonish, resulting in 3 Ph.D candidates filing requests for grants to ascertain why. These students were considered representative, not only of the youth of Canada, but of the Senate, the Conference Board of Canada, all Rotary Clubs, and the Al Qaeda chapter in Helsinki.
Obviously, this is not a healthy situation. Canada has pretensions to becoming a practicing democracy and to have this kind of desultory attention paid to what might someday be an important station in Canadian political life, is, in words of the noted political analyst and hockey colorman, Danny Kumquat, a 'load of real discouraging moose turds'. Kumquat, recently appointed as honorary chair of the political science department at Slippery Otter School for the Intellectually Challenged in Calgary, claims to be the only public figure of note in the entire country. 'You could make a case, maybe, for Rick Mercer,' mused Kumquat, 'But he never played for Eddie Shore, so he doesn't really count.'
'Why can't Canadian politics be more like my suits? Colorful and slightly outrageous.'
Given the revitalization and excitement now present in American politics, Kumquat's comments deserve attention. Canada can no longer wallow in numbing political boredom, beset on all sides by cutout public figures, small-minded backroom boys, and a voting public that would apparently prefer its politicians remain anonymous. Even those with limited hearing can surely hear the cry arise throughout the land - GIVE US MORE EXCITEMENT! MAKE US QUIT WISHING BARACK OBAMA WAS CANADIAN!
The cry was heard: a non-prophet think tank called HMMMM (How May Men Manage Misgovernment) centred in Summer Toad, Manitoba, convened hastily and drew up the following recommendations:
1) A new TV production - Canadian Political Idol - no party affiliation required. Aspiring political leaders audition before a panel of retired Senators (there must be some . . .) Singing talent is optional but acting talent is essential. Routines may include anything from Mel Brooks to Shakespeare and will be judged on their ability to flabbergast, revolt, and amuse. Winners will be treated to new wardrobes from Mark and Mary's Work Warehouse and Acme Masquerade and supplied with nomination papers for the riding of their choice.
2) Everyone in the next federal election will run as an independent. Those elected will be permitted to form ad-hoc parties in the House. Any criteria for finding common ground will be legitimate, including, but not limited to, astrological signs, 6 degrees of separation, shared childhood maladies, television viewing preferences, UFO experiences, and proficiency with cell phones. Rushing and Hazing will be encouraged. Cabinet ministers will be selected by improvised dress code.
3) Regardless - OK, irregardless - of party formations, voting on bills will be independent. To compensate, fist-fighting and unrestricted name calling will be allowed. Debate will be limited to 1 minute per speaker, maximum 4 speakers per motion. Attendance is mandatory. The Commons floor will be encase in a wire cage and misanthropic guards posted at all exits. Loudspeakers will exhort members to pummel and dis especially boring and/or stupid speakers.
4) Voting will be compulsory. Voting 'press gangs' will be formed and rewards given to the gangs that shanghai the most stay-at-home voters. Breaking and entering laws will be suspended while polling booths are open. Non-voters who evade the press gangs will be hunted down, sentenced to stuff themselves at a local all-you-can-eat buffet and then watch the latest Newfoundland seal hunt.
HMMMM is confident these measures will revive interest in Canada's moldering democracy. Current MP's are, of course, invited to participate.
RAD
Friday, January 16, 2009
Friday, January 2, 2009
COOPERATION
I know it sounds naive, but would it be too much to ask, in this year of huge uncertainty, that the word cooperation be revived?
We've gone through four decades of swirling economics, bitter domestic antagonisms, disintegrating social structures, and grand theft, institutionalized theft, on a scale unprecedented in history. All this ignorance (both wilful and unintended) has left us now facing obstacles to our collective well-being that loom frighteningly in every home, every business, every church, every school, and, we hope, every university and secondary school.
It's difficult for anyone - anyone - to fathom the extent of damage done to the social and economic fabric of the U.S. Our presumed leadership - at all levels and all capacities - has been brutally exposed as a cadre of self-satisfied dolts and felons for whom we can only wish at least one blinding moment of self-awareness. Almost in despair, we cling to Barack Obama as a savior of sorts and, if nothing else, this is unfair. Given the level of leadership competition (think Bill Clinton charging $2500 a head to lecture on leadership - is it any wonder we're in this pickle?), it's understandable that we should hold out such hope in one man but perhaps we need to invest in a few new rules of thought if we are to rebuild, re-energize, and re-focus this country. Barack is going to need your help.
We could do worse than emphasize a spirit of cooperation. By that I mean finding a way to work together - much the way neighbors do during a crisis - to seek solutions and implement whatever measures are deemed to be positive. Positive in what way, you say?
If it's possible to render a few goals clearly, goals that are so basic, yet crucial, that no thinking person could disagree, then we can keep things simple and minimize the inevitable bickering that comes from a society that has spent far too long seeing the individual (ME!) as the only important consideration in life.
1. Everyone wants and needs a job that pays a decent (liveable) wage.
2. It's time we thought in terms of working with people, not for them.
3. Taxes can be fair and everyone must pay. It's the price of living without a chain around your leg.
4. Change is inevitable and not a bad thing. We ARE incredibly adaptable and actually take pleasure in achieving things we had not thought either possible or part of our lives.
5. The losers and abusers are in the minority. Let's stop worrying about their beyond-the-pale behavior and concentrate on recognizing the honest effort of most of people.
6. If something isn't working, scrap it and find something new.
7. Comprehensive health must be made available to everyone. And it must be affordable.
8. Government IS you. Don't let anyone tell you different.
I guess it all boils down to attitude and, without sounding pollyannish, we can, without destroying individual initiative, work together to rebuild our shattered nation. The time to jettison the nasty partisanship and smug selfishness is long overdue. One can still be a success without acting like Sammy Glick. We need to work with our governments at every level to scratch and fight our way back to hope and prosperity. It's a trite but true idea that Americans are both resilient and creative. Let's get working.
And, if some of what I've said smacks of socialism, then so be it. Socialism for the rich has been the hallmark of the past forty years. If you don't already know this, the big boys rarely, if ever, lift a finger to act unless there is a government incentive, grant, tax break, depletion allopwance, or backstop propping up their capitalist charade. It's time we spread our wealth around.
RAD
We've gone through four decades of swirling economics, bitter domestic antagonisms, disintegrating social structures, and grand theft, institutionalized theft, on a scale unprecedented in history. All this ignorance (both wilful and unintended) has left us now facing obstacles to our collective well-being that loom frighteningly in every home, every business, every church, every school, and, we hope, every university and secondary school.
It's difficult for anyone - anyone - to fathom the extent of damage done to the social and economic fabric of the U.S. Our presumed leadership - at all levels and all capacities - has been brutally exposed as a cadre of self-satisfied dolts and felons for whom we can only wish at least one blinding moment of self-awareness. Almost in despair, we cling to Barack Obama as a savior of sorts and, if nothing else, this is unfair. Given the level of leadership competition (think Bill Clinton charging $2500 a head to lecture on leadership - is it any wonder we're in this pickle?), it's understandable that we should hold out such hope in one man but perhaps we need to invest in a few new rules of thought if we are to rebuild, re-energize, and re-focus this country. Barack is going to need your help.
We could do worse than emphasize a spirit of cooperation. By that I mean finding a way to work together - much the way neighbors do during a crisis - to seek solutions and implement whatever measures are deemed to be positive. Positive in what way, you say?
If it's possible to render a few goals clearly, goals that are so basic, yet crucial, that no thinking person could disagree, then we can keep things simple and minimize the inevitable bickering that comes from a society that has spent far too long seeing the individual (ME!) as the only important consideration in life.
1. Everyone wants and needs a job that pays a decent (liveable) wage.
2. It's time we thought in terms of working with people, not for them.
3. Taxes can be fair and everyone must pay. It's the price of living without a chain around your leg.
4. Change is inevitable and not a bad thing. We ARE incredibly adaptable and actually take pleasure in achieving things we had not thought either possible or part of our lives.
5. The losers and abusers are in the minority. Let's stop worrying about their beyond-the-pale behavior and concentrate on recognizing the honest effort of most of people.
6. If something isn't working, scrap it and find something new.
7. Comprehensive health must be made available to everyone. And it must be affordable.
8. Government IS you. Don't let anyone tell you different.
I guess it all boils down to attitude and, without sounding pollyannish, we can, without destroying individual initiative, work together to rebuild our shattered nation. The time to jettison the nasty partisanship and smug selfishness is long overdue. One can still be a success without acting like Sammy Glick. We need to work with our governments at every level to scratch and fight our way back to hope and prosperity. It's a trite but true idea that Americans are both resilient and creative. Let's get working.
And, if some of what I've said smacks of socialism, then so be it. Socialism for the rich has been the hallmark of the past forty years. If you don't already know this, the big boys rarely, if ever, lift a finger to act unless there is a government incentive, grant, tax break, depletion allopwance, or backstop propping up their capitalist charade. It's time we spread our wealth around.
RAD
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